


Softly Softly

by dameadozen



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Christmas, Eventual Romance, F/F, Falling In Love, Fluff and Smut, Lesbian Sex, Masturbation, Slow Burn, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-09
Updated: 2018-11-29
Packaged: 2019-07-10 04:56:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 19,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15942221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dameadozen/pseuds/dameadozen
Summary: When Katya's rag tag team of artists pitches up at the Christmas market, she finds her booth next door to a beautiful, gentle woman making crepes and selling Christmas CDs.Realising the Country Girl needs a softer approach, she finds herself involved in something way outside her comfort zone. Romance?





	1. Twas the Night Before Christmas

**Author's Note:**

> What more could you want at the end of the summer than a nice slow burn Christmas fluff?  
> Then, eventually, not so fluff...  
> Katya mentioned a love of Christmas markets so here we go.

Twas the month before Christmas,   
And all through the house,  
Everyone was stirring,  
Because the Christmas market was opening tomorrow and nothing was fucking ready.

Katya was perched on a stool at the tall desk furiously printing the final batch of Christmas cards with her hand carved wooden blocks.  
Sasha was tying ribbon after ribbon onto handmade tree decorations while her partner Shea grabbed them off her to carefully pack into bubble-wrap envelopes in a giant crate.  
Even Aunt Kasha had been drafted in last minute and she was drifting around, packing boxes into the van, making 'Christmas Coffee' (a hint of Baileys) and playing 'motivational Christmas music'.  
The mood was frantic and everyone was reluctantly coming to terms with the fact that they might need to pull an all-nighter to be ready for market day tomorrow.

The market was a big deal. From mid-November through to Christmas Eve the park filled with mini 'Swiss ski-lodge' huts and vendors from all over Boston area gathered to sell their wares. It was a bright, festive reprieve from the cold, grey days of Boston in winter time and the park was full, day and night of families with little kids going on fairground rides, couples romantically feeding each other cinnamon buns and groups of young people overindulging in mulled cider. It was a pine scented paradise and Katya loved it.  
For 90% of the year the 'Nightgowns Artistic Collective', produced paintings, prints and live performances but for 10% of their year, they transformed into a holly jolly money making machine to try to provide enough funds for some of their less conventional projects.  
The flat had red white and green glitter plastered on every surface as the women created their full range of Christmas decorations, stockings, wreaths, cards and centrepieces. It was always lucrative, pretty fun and horribly last minute.

Katya stood up and rotated her shoulders, trying to rid herself of some of the tension that had built up. Maybe, she shouldn't have been as stressed as she was. After all, they had more than enough stock for the rest of the festival but the Grand Opening needed special stuff and they were behind.   
With five hours to go until they had to drive to the park, Katya wanted to get her ass in gear. Reaching for her hairdryer, she flipped it onto the cool setting and started wafting it gently over the handprinted cards clothes-pinned to the wire above her head. They needed to be dry two hours ago and she needed to chill the fuck out.

There was something nice about the hive of activity though. Katya loved working with a group of women and the buzz that only happened when they were working in a crunch. She smirked at the realisation that she would hate it if she had nothing to do. She'd probably be awake anyway, imagining potential catastrophes that could happen on Opening Day.  
What if the people at the booth next to them were super religious and hated them? What if they ran out of change and lost loads of customers? What if everything fell apart/flooded/went on fire/the booth collapsed? Katya could run endless disaster simulations if her mind was left unsupervised.  
After a decent amount of success last year, the 'NACdoesChristmas' stall had been awarded an even better location. They were now situated right beside the Ski-Lodge Bar and between two food stands. This both increased the number of drunken purchases and cut down on arts and crafts competition beside them. Katya glanced at the letter pinned on the noticeboard in front of her to remind herself of the names of the vendors but she couldn't place them.   
Last year had been a blur. Katya's first time project managing the booth had been a success, (even if her 'festive' selection of handmade earrings hadn't been their best sellers). The Christmas Market was now Katya's baby and she wasn't going to let herself feel anxious anymore.

Judging the ink to be dry, Katya set aside the hairdryer, unpinned the cards and stacked them, and their envelopes in a box. Kasha was beside her, cooing encouragement and removing the box within two seconds, dancing her way out to the van.

"How are we going, ladies?" Katya croaked, turning to watch her two friends beavering away with ribbon.  
"So close... Ten minutes and the last batch is done, Kat," Shea said while Sasha intently tried to poke the pointed end of a bit of gingham ribbon through a very small wire loop.  
"Good! With just over four hours to go so we can all catch a small nap! Best timings yet!" Katya tried to sound enthusiastic but her eyes were equal parts totally frantic and totally dead.

She wandered over to the window and looked out at the chill outside. It might be nice to have a bit of snow tomorrow but, then again, it might put people off and they could do with as many people as they could get on opening day.  
The idea of snow at 3am was always more festive than trudging through grey slush in the daytime.  
Katya pulled the long, colourful, woolen cardigan around her tightly, enjoying the warmth and the simulated hug from the fabric. She did love this time of year. Hated shitty weather. But loved the buzz of the market, the sweet food, friendliness of people, the goofy music which drove them mad day after day and the feeling of everyone coming together.

Katya knew in her heart that she was in possession of workaholic tendancies.   
The sad truth is that this festival was as close as she got to a holiday last year.   
Sighing and taking another drink from her mug, Katya hoped for a happier Christmas.


	2. Jingle Belle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Writing meetings is rough but they have to meet somehow.
> 
> This chapter is about that feeling of when you are exhausted and have a bit of hollow anxiety jangling around in your husk of a body and you still have to do loads of work on a big project.

The stockings were hung in the cabin with care  
In the hopes that the customers soon would be there...

There was a lot of hustle and bustle in the market square but inside the actual booth, Katya's mind was left to wander in a sleepy daze as she worked herself to get the stall up and running.  
She had left the other women at home for a couple more hours nap and headed down to start herself. She needed to rig up the card machine and the till and shift heavy boxes. Fiddly, uninteresting and brute force jobs that would have been frustrating for the four of them to attempt in the confined space of the cabin.

Feeling exhausted and anxious is a strange combination. The knowledge that you look like shit, your mind has gone to shit and you need to be on top of your shit in a relatively small amount of time is not a great amalgamation. 

It was the first time in ages she felt heart-pounding hollowness. Katya had even semi-successfully shut her brain up with organising and working for months now but with lugging heavy boxes as her only distraction, her thoughts were spiralling worse than usual. The smells and sights were making her nostalgic for what she had never really had.   
It didn't necessarily bother her. It definitely didn't when she was surrounded by strong, productive women sharing their lives together and finding their own reason for the season. But occasionally, when she was on her own, a yearning for a softer moment crept in. When she imagined Shea and Sasha as she left them this morning, all curled up together on the couch, it tugged a little.   
Would she ever be cosy like that and does she seriously ever want to be?

The smell of cinnamon and warm mulled cider made something deep down want to say yes.

But there were boxes to carry and strings of Christmas lights to untangle.

A couple of hours later and everything was set up except for the displays of stock. Sasha had lovingly banned her from this task the previous evening, gently suggesting that Katya's sense of order might be a bit chaotic for your average person. Katya begrudgingly agreed. She knew how to create beautiful things but it was Shea who knew how to sell sell sell them. In another life Shea could have designed storefronts for major companies. She always knew the perfect way to showcase beauty. Sasha and Katya were the 'arty farty' ones but Shea was essential to the collective. Shea was the one who knew how to connect with people and, in turn, how to make the work connect with people.

Katya sat in her half prepared booth, waiting for her little gang and sipping on a coffee. She was in two minds about it so she took tiny little baby bird sips. Was it more worth it to drink it and warm her insides or to hold it and heat up her fingertips which were slowly turning blue with the Boston chill? Katya contemplated and watched the other vendors getting ready. 

The market was set up in a main square with little rows of booths coming off of it. Every stand was inside a mini Swiss chalet and the whole place of a ski resort which had shrunk in the wash. Each booth was rustic with logs, delicately painted signage and faux pine greenery. It would be beautiful when it actually snowed, she thought. Out of the other vendors, Katya was most interested in two heavily bearded men who looked more bear than human. The lumberjacks were sitting on tree stumps and whittling in front of their stand of wooden tree ornaments. They seemed quiet but friendly with each other, grumbling the odd comment and occasionally brushing wooden shavings off their overalls and onto the floor. Maybe they might teach her if she got to know them later in the festival. She could imagine whittling being a good use for her constant stream of nervous energy.

As she took another sip of the now-wasted, tepid coffee, she saw a stack of boxes bumbling towards her booth. She could see a pair of legs in cosy boots and big thick socks but apart from that, it was all precariously wobbling boxes.  
Darting round the counter, Katya reached out to grab the leaning tower, first steadying the stack, then moving to grab the top two.  
She revealed the relieved face of a short blonde girl with big, expressive eyes and bubblegum pink lips.

"Thanks, I thought I was going to lose everything there. That would have been an entrance..." she giggled placing her own boxes down on the ground at the booth next door and rifling through her jacket pockets for her keys.  
"No problem! Always happy to help a neighbour," Katya replied, placing the other boxes down and grinning back at the chirpy Skipper doll in front of her.  
"Hey, it's nice to meet you! I'm Farrah! I'm crepe girl..." she pulled out a manicured hand, waving at the front of her booth before grabbing Katya's ice cold hand, shaking it energetically.  
"I'm Katya, I run the Nightgowns booth. We sell arty shit," Katya attempted to give her usual rundown but her body was too cold and tired for a much better explanation than that.

"Looks pretty minimalist at the moment... Modern..." a low voice with a twang came from behind her and Katya whirled round landing face to bust with one of the most striking women she had ever seen.

If Farrah was Skipper, this was Barbie. This was countryside, oaky smokey, don't break my achey breaky heart, Dolly Parton Barbie.   
And Katya was obsessed.  
She stood there, brain fog preventing her from doing or saying anything except just staring at the blonde hair and smirking lips.

"Don't mind her, Katya, she's got a big mouth and no manners!" Farrah squealed, squeezing her arm and bringing her back to reality.  
"Huh, no don't worry... It's pretty funny... We're way behind... Speaking of which..." Katya kind of wiggled her shoulders, trying to suggest she should get back but she knew she was coming across as a human who had been raised by wolves and had never met another person before.

She stumbled slightly backwards and waved as she reached her booth and started shifting around boxes, attempting to look busy in the hope that she would find a job to do in the process.  
Two minutes into her rummage, she found the paper gift bags and began to put a bunch of pre-orders together for later that afternoon. Fighting against every rattled nerve in her body, she forced her brain to engage in the task.

It was around half an hour later when her phone chirped announcing the imminent arrival of the other girls.   
When she looked up her eyes immediately zoomed in and clocked the life size Barbie, pulling on a pink apron and staring right at her. 

At that moment, she realised that it was going to be a very very long winter.


	3. It'll Be Lonely This Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After days of exhaustion and stress, Katya finds a few ways to blow off some steam...

Katya was nestled all snug in her bed  
While visions of Barbie dolls danced in her head

It's been days since Katya got anything more than three hours of broken sleep and she is officially drifting around in a daze.   
Shea and Sasha delivered her back to her front door, even going to the effort of unlocking it for her and telling her they would handle the shift the following morning.  
Katya was so tired she could only shrug and accept it. She vaguely remembers stumbling through her apartment, collapsing onto her unmade bed and immediately succumbing to the sleep.

In her dreams, there are rushes of angry customers, an emergency lack of stock and a curious, beautiful blonde woman watching her. Dream Katya is surrounded by swirling mist and snow and even though it should feel like a total nightmare, she seems to have have an awareness that it's all just pretend. It's so surreal, she finds the confidence to smirk back at the distant blonde with the pink apron. Her stomach twists when her face lights up across the twirling, white snow. The haunting carousel music is washed over by static sounds and the rushing of the wind and she feels herself falling...

It's eleven am when Katya wakes with a start. She's still dressed and curled on top of her bedcovers. She even has her shoes on. And she feels disorientated.  
She is roasting and clammy under all the layers of clothes but her warm breath fogs in the freezing cold air around her.  
Five years ago it might have been that she woke up from heavy drinking and snorting her way around seedy clubs but now, she knows she's just overworked and lethargic from too much sleep at one time.  
She sits up and stretches out before peeling off the musky layers of clothing. 

It's rare for her to feel super attractive and she doesn't. She feels grim.  
Naked and rapidly beginning to freeze, Katya stumbles through to her bathroom and throws her body under the shower.

Each blast of warm water relaxes her stiff joints and with the addition of some body wash, she begins to feel human again.  
It always happens this way. Halfway through a major project, she is always convinced of how well she is handling it. She commits to the 'final push' and, before she knows it, she's waking up out of a daze three days after completion. It's only ever then that she realises that she hadn't been handling it as well as she had thought. Caffeine, cigarettes and the odd pint of ice cream are no replacement for a good sleep schedule and regular meals.  
The water washes away some of the grit though and her exterior is a little fresher.

Determined to match the inside and the outside, she lists her successes in her head, repeating them like a mantra:  
\- She is running a successful business which opened without a hitch  
\- She has an amazing group of friends  
\- Some of that group of friends and colleagues who she loves are running it right now so she can take a break  
\- It's nearly Christmas  
\- Her family are proud of her  
\- She changed her life for the better two years ago and hasn't had a major stumble since  
\- She is practising yoga again  
\- She met new people yesterday and it wasn't a disaster  
\- She's 35 and her body is still mostly high and tight and for all her self perceived flaws, she knows she's doing ok...

The mantra works a little and she takes time to wash her hair, putting extra conditioner into the dry ends. Her head is spinning less and she feels her body connecting again, finally noticing the tiny aches and pains she has tuned out over the last two weeks. She stretches a little before rinsing out her hair, smelling mint and apple bubbles.

She considers her body as she runs her hands over herself. She has been dressing in a variety of baggy, comfortable clothes for the last few weeks. Often, they were grubby with paint or chalk or glue and she only managed to look presentable for the opening yesterday due to Shea forcing her into a Christmas sweater.  
But she takes an extra minute to exfoliate, shave and spread a nice shower cream over herself and is thrilled to see that she still has a body worth touching under all her bulky woollen layers. Her tits are nice. Her nipples are pretty dark but she likes how sensitive they are and she has a good cleavage when she wears the right bra. She has a nice butt too. Firm and strong. She would check out her ass from behind, she considers, turning to try and get a decent view in the mirror. It's perky and she knows it looks even better when she wears her boots. She doesn't have much in the way of hips and she runs her hands over her pelvis, thinking longingly of the hourglass figure she watched putting on her apron yesterday. She loves how strong she has been getting and she doesn't seriously feel much envy but she would love to at least get the chance to touch a figure like that. It's been a long time since she had a woman in her bed. She would know exactly how to touch her.

There isn't a real reason for her to be as single as she is, at least not physically. She's just been focusing her energy elsewhere.  
It would be nice to have someone else's hands to touch her back.

Katya sighs at her dumb self because her mind is wandering to the haunting blonde woman again and her hands are too.  
Her thighs clench and she gently brushes her hard nipples to test the waters.  
Between her legs is growing slick.   
If she really wants to relax and get energised for the day, there is one final way she could blow off steam...

Katya lets her eyes close and rubs two of her fingers over the little bundle of nerves. She dips them softly inside where she is warm and soaked and enjoys the sensations of spreading her wetness over herself.   
She isn't going to drag it out. She circles her clit quickly, using her other hand to pinch her nipples. A small moan escapes her and she pinches harder. Circles faster.  
She allows herself to imagine brown eyes and that smooth, low voice as she rubs. Katya shivers as she imagines the woman exploring her. She is taller than her, broader too. She would have bigger hands. Katya moans again at the thought of them, grabbing her, touching her, fucking her.  
Her pussy is throbbing deliciously and a knot is forming low in her stomach. She rubs harder, fucking into herself roughly every few circles in a quickening rhythm. She moans a little more and the noise reverberating around the tile spurs her on until she's gasping and cumming.

Katya's body finally relaxes and she feels giddy and grounded for the first time in weeks. She catches herself, finishes rinsing and wraps herself in a giant, soft towel.   
Staring in the mirror, her eyes look brighter than they have for ages. She looks good. More energetic. She should jilled herself off days ago.

Grinning, she considers that now she has to go along to work and face the object of her secret shower fantasies.  
She'll definitely need to order a coffee, if only to see if her hands are as big and strong as she imagines.


	4. Blue Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After her brief moment of clarity in the shower, Katya is full of the fear again and behaving like a weirdo.
> 
> Thank God for Shea...
> 
> The obligatory pining is coming to an end. (Pine-ing) The romance is beginning.

And wrapped in my scarf with thick gloves on my hands,  
I got settled in for a shift on the stand,  
When I had just watched all my bravery scatter,  
Shea NEEDED to find out what was the matter.

 

Katya didn't go for coffee that afternoon.

Or the following days.

Feeling silly and timid, she dodged Barbie's eyeline, only waving occasionally at Farrah when she took over shifts.  
She spent a lot of time selling, updating the website and social media, keeping better track of the books than ever before and chasing up new stock.  
Before and after work she was exercising furiously. Bending herself in knots, running for miles and taking extra classes at the gym was becoming her norm.  
It was driving her nuts that she couldn't just shake off a two minute interaction that happened almost a week ago.

 

"Right, what the fuck is going on with you?" Shea exploded one day when Katya offered to run to the bank for the third time.  
"Nothing, I just fancied a walk... Jeez, Shea," Katya shrugged, feigning a 'chill' exterior.  
"Nah, I'm not buying it. You did hot yoga this morning and I know you have weights tonight. Why all the frenetic energy? I'm used to you being a workaholic but this is ridiculous," Shea responded, refusing to be led.  
"Okay Mother, I'll make sure to keep to my schedule with precision. I wouldn't wish to startle you. Not with the Yuletide approaching..." Katya replied in a creepy voice.

She didn't know why but this weird gut feeling wasn't something she wanted to make public. Her stupid sense of humour was her number one way of escaping the conversation. She knew she was deflecting with all her might but she could tell by Shea's stony face that she would not be led...

"Katya, I'm a little worried. Sash is too," Shea said gently, looking down at the counter and fiddling with the empty float bags.  
"Nah. It's nothing to worry about. It's nothing I should be thinking about... I'm just trying to burn my energy in more productive ways than letting it fester in my brain," Katya sighed.  
"What is it you shouldn't be thinking about? Has something happened with your Mom?" Shea asked softly.  
"No. Fuck. Nothing like that. It's just some girl that I kind of met but not really and I've thought about her a little bit but I don't know whether to actually talk to her or not. I've worked so hard for this and I don't want anything to distract from work right now," Katya said, immediately wishing she could swallow back her words.

Some girl she kind of met. Katya felt like a fucking prize fool.  
Shea only threw back her head and let out a laugh that seemed more relieved than joyful.

"Fuck, Kat. I thought it was something terrible. You've been acting like a robot for days! Who is she? I've never seen you crush on anyone," Shea was clearly trying to catch her eye with her beautiful smile stretched wide.  
"Nope. She's just someone I met and I kind of fumbled our first conversation. It's not even worth obsessing over," Katya grabbed the plastic float bags and her own purse as she spoke. She picked up her giant scarf and started winding it around her neck.

She felt gentle, giant hands clasp at her own, startling her and stilling the movement.

"Kat, don't you think it's too late? You've obviously spent the week obsessing. Who is she?" Shea said softly, wide eyed with a small smile.  
"I don't even remember her name. I couldn't even say if she told me. It was a blur. She's the tall blonde one who works at the Crepe stand... I kind of call her Barbie in my head," Katya couldn't meet Shea's eyes while she confessed.  
"It's a fucking crush not the end of the world, Zamo! Don't be so embarrassed... Look, go get that change and we'll have a proper chat when you get back. Stop freaking out about nothing," Shea squeezed her hands and let go, allowing Katya to escape.

 

Stomping along the wet pavements and trying to dodge the little frozen patches, Katya finally let her mind wander.  
It was kind of crazy that she was dealing with this so poorly.  
It wasn't as if she was some blushing virgin who didn't know how to talk to women. She was awkward, sure, but she used it as part of her charm most of the time. She hadn't ever really been 'too shy' to talk to anyone. In fact, she had a pretty amazing success rate at picking up people in bars. Why was she suddenly acting all high school about the blonde cheerleader. The thought alone made her annoyed at herself.

She was just a fucking person, after all. And she would probably only be there until Christmas was done. So why was she acting like walking over to a stand, ordering a coffee and offering an introduction was some sort of proposal?  
Maybe it was that small voice inside her that wasn't entirely sure if Barbie was gay.   
Maybe it was that small voice inside her that was convinced that Barbie wouldn't even be interested in her.  
Maybe it was that small voice inside her that was positive that sleeping with her wouldn't be enough anyway.

She knew one thing, though. She had tried for a week and no amount of hot yoga and shower masturbation made the voices quieter.

 

Katya turned into the marketplace to see Shea perched in front of their counter, sipping coffee and chatting away to a very blonde woman.  
Fuck sake, Katya groaned, almost turning on the spot and leaving right out of the gate again.  
Why the fuck would Shea get involved?  
She was hopeless but she didn't need to be set up like a kid on a playdate...

Katya grimaced when Shea spotted her. She waved back when Shea frantically waved her over and she watched as the blonde figure turned.

With each seemingly endless step, Katya realised that the blonde was too short to be Barbie.   
The panic dial in her brain clicked down three notches.  
It was Skipper Farrah.  
The panic dial clicked back up one notch.

 

"Hey Katya, I brought you guys over some coffee. It's getting cold! I almost slipped on black ice this morning. I'm definitely wearing my proper boots tomorrow, even if they are totally clumpy and vile..." Farrah passed over a coffee, twittering at a thousand miles an hour and Katya sipped it, glad for an excuse not to talk until she was certain she could form a sentence.  
"Farrah was telling me that you were their knight in shining armour last week?" Shea interrupted smoothly, bringing the conversation back on course but forcing Katya to respond.  
"Yeah, I guess but it was just a few boxes..."  
"KATYA! I would have DIED if I dropped the box with the jams and honeys in. Trixie would have straight up murdered me! It's not as if I don't fuck up enough..." Farrah interrupted, nudging Katya conspiratorially, as if it was some big secret they were both in on.

 

Trixie.  
Her name was Trixie.  
How her parents had managed to come up with a more appropriate name than Barbie, Katya didn't know but they had. Trixie. Jesus.

 

"... she's your sister huh?" Katya tuned back into the chat to hear Shea ask Farrah politely.  
"Oh yeah. My big sister. My Aunt usually runs the booth but she wanted to get Trix and I out of the the middle of NOWHERE. She's helping us escape to the big city... The only sweethearts worth talking to where we're from are your cousins and that ain't right," Farrah cackled.  
"Jesus, you're right about that! And you guys sing? I saw CDs at your booth?" Shea asked, giggling back.  
"Well... It's more Trix's pet project. She writes and sings and plays guitar. I play a little piano but she writes all the arrangements and things. She's kind of blessed that way. We thought it might be kind of fun to do some Christmas songs to take here. We only have like 100 discs. It's just for fun really," Farrah replied, a little shyly but with no less enthusiasm.  
"If you wanna see some music here, we could all take you out some time? I know a little bar with a great open mic night? You should get to experience the night life as part of your escape!," Shea sounded enthusiastic and linked an arm with Katya, attempting to drag her into her devious plot.

Katya's head was spinning and she could feel the blood pumping around her body. Shea's plan was too transparent. The playdate was being settled before her very eyes. Shea was matchmaker and she was powerless.  
Waiting on Farrah's response to a tentative plan was bad enough. How was the going to handle herself in front of the person she actually wanted a date with?

A second had become an hour by the time Farrah squealed and threw her arms around them both.

"Oh my god! I would love that! You guys are so friendly for inviting us! I don't know if we're cool enough but I'll sure try! Oh LORD what do I wear..." and Farrah was off again, twittering cutely about all the possibilities one night in a dive bar in Boston could bring.  
"WOAH Blondie! Just bring yourselves. It's always pretty casual. What about you, Trixie, Katya, me and my partner Sasha tomorrow night? We can go from here at closing?" Shea giggled, throwing her arm back around Farrah's tiny shoulders and squeezing her.  
"YES. Absolutely! I haven't been out on the town in ages and Aunt T was desperate to get us living life! When she hears we are going out with ARTISTS she is going to freak out! Hey, is your girlfriend the bald one?" Farrah riffed again, not stopping for breath and eyes gleaming.  
"Yeah, that's Sasha! She'll probably perform tomorrow," Shea was smiling but Katya could tell that she was testing the 'homophobia waters' with Farrah.  
"Oh my God. If someone I know gets up on stage, I will DIE. I hope she's ready for some really loud squealing! I will be her number one fan!," Farrah giggled and Katya could feel Shea's internal sigh of relief.

 

A little chirp cut through the friendly laughter and Farrah's eyes widened more than possible as she grabbed her phone.

"Yes Trixie, I know I've been gone for fifteen minutes but I was getting us a SOCIAL LIFE... Yeah, I know there's a queue. I'll be there in a second. Jeez Trix... LORD... OKAY..." and just like that Farrah was gone, rolling her eyes and grinning manically as she skipped back towards her booth where Katya could see an annoyed looking blonde Barbie and about 10 customers queued.

 

"Shea," Katya said in a low, slow, tone.  
"Yes, Katya, darling," Shea replied.  
"I am going to kill you," Katya groaned before moving behind the counter and flopping down onto the soggy, wooden floor.

 

Three hours later, the market was beginning to wind down and Shea had wisely made herself scarce taking boxes to the recycling bins.  
Katya was attempting to count dollars and cents but the freezing cold and nervousness had numbed her brain.  
Her eyes hazily wandering across a pile of pennies, she saw a takeaway box slide into view.  
She blinked slowly and smelled something sweet and chocolate-y.

"Nice apology, Shea, but it's gonna take a lot more than that..." Katya looked up with one eyebrow raised and came face to face with someone who absolutely wasn't Shea.  
"I've not done anything to apologise for yet but it might work as a thank you for the invite..." Trixie replied with her low, smooth voice and a smirk.

Katya could only stand slack-jawed and watch the blonde wink, turn on her heels and strut off. Her shy heart fluttered at the sight of Trixie leaving under the festoons of twinkling Christmas lights and out into the dark.


	5. It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Farrah is a lovable dork who just wants her sister to be happy.  
> And she also just wants some dick.  
> From a guy who has a dog.

Away to the pub I trod through the snow,  
To meet the cute girl that I don't really know.

 

Katya took a giant, deep breath and walked through the door into the bar.

She had decided to go home and get ready after her shift on the stall, making her excuses (dirty lies) that she had to pick up her wallet.   
In truth, it was to avoid walking with the other girls and give herself a bit of time to prepare. Hopefully by the time she arrived, they would all be a drink or two in and not notice her awkwardness.  
Besides, she smelled ripe after working all day and a quick shower and change of shirt would do her confidence a world of good.

Standing in the doorway, however, she wasn't feeling an enormous amount of confidence.

Katya looked around at the familiar scene. Their place of choice was a hangover from their student days. The lighting was mostly made up of the dim glow of a thousand deformed candles dripping wax onto a series of mismatched furniture. There were beanbags in the corner and exotic tapestries haphazardly hung along the walls. There were shelves filled with old books and oddities. There was a tiny stage covered in layers of old posters, perfect for the college slam poets and grunge bands who occasionally played here. The demographic was 'poor art students' and the drinks were dirt cheap.

She had been there a thousand times before stumbling home. Or stumbling to someone else's home...  
If she could be confident anywhere, it was here.  
But she'd need a drink.

"Long time no see! You look like you need a drink?" Jinx, smiled from behind the bar.

Jinx was a longtime bar tender, longtime friend.  
She had studied everything at uni from poetry to music to history of art. Nothing had lasted more than a semester... She described herself as a renaissance woman and she was a total nutty delight.

"Desperately..." Katya gave an over dramatic sigh and Jinx laughed, pulling out a beer and jamming a lime wedge in the top.  
"What's up Blondie?" Jinx asked, pushing it towards her.  
"I'm working hard and Shea thinks I need to be distracted," Katya muttered, only revealing a safe half truth.

Jinx looked across the room and then turned her attention back to Katya.

"Is she attempting to distract you with the two Valley Girls over there? If so, I don't know if your ancient bones will handle it," Jinx asked, an eyebrow raised.  
"I think that's her intention," Katya sighed back.  
"But it's not like you to be huffy over the opportunity to get a little pussy?" Jinx queried, watching Katya push the lime wedge down into the neck of the bottle and take a sip.  
"I'm just off my game. It's the tall one. I don't know how to talk to her..."

Jinx grabbed some glasses off the bar, looking across the bar with wide eyes.  
As she turned to wiggle to the sink, Katya just heard her sing song tunefully, "Well you're gonna have to figure it ouuuttt..."

Confused, Katya frowned before feeling a hand on her shoulder.

"Lost stranger?"

Katya knew that voice and froze as Trixie slid into the seat beside her.  
She took a deep breath and another long sip before replying.

"Just grabbing a drink before getting roped into the festivities. Can I get you anything?" she managed to get out.  
"Jesus, that's the most I've ever heard you speak. I'll have what you're having," Trixie deadpanned. 

Katya motioned at Jinx for another and Jinx smiled, giving a double thumbs up that made her whole body cringe.

"So how you enjoying Boston?" Katya asked quietly, even coping with the tiniest amount of eye contact.  
"It's cold and grey and I'm surrounded by my crazy Aunt and Farrah so I'm taking it a day at a time..." Trixie replied, keeping a straight face before snorting and giving one big laugh.

Katya loved it. That ridiculous cackle. So abrupt. Katya wanted nothing more than to make her do it again.

"But look at all our high class establishments? You got sticky floors like this in the middle of nowhere?" Katya deadpanned back, motioning around the bar.  
"We put sawdust down on ours to avoid accidents..." Trixie fired right back.

Katya snorted a laugh. Trixie was so quick-witted and dry it made her anxiousness turn to excitement. Well... A little bit.

"Thanks again for inviting us. It meant a lot to Farrah. Your friends are nice," Trixie motioned her head back over to the table.  
"They're pretty great. Please tell me they haven't been making you guys their third wheel?" Katya asked hurridly as she followed Trixie's gaze to see Sasha snuggled in beside Shea, head rested on her shoulder.  
"Nah. It's nice. We wouldn't see that much back home," Trixie replied, her voice softer, taking a sip of beer.

This was it. The clear opportunity. Swallowing her pride and keeping her eyes strictly averted to her own beer, Katya asked,

"What about you and Farrah? Any sweethearts back home?"

Katya heard Trixie giggle a little in response but she resolutely kept her eyes on the condensation dripping down the neck of the beer bottle.

"Farrah's always got some little farm guy in her clutches but I'm just me. As I said, we don't see that much back home..." Trixie replied, her voice containing a smile.

Katya eyebrows furrowed in confusion but before she could wrap her head around what was said, Trixie was grabbing her arm and pulling her up and back over to their table.

 

It had been about an hour of Shea, Sasha and Farrah dominating the conversation when the open mic acts started.  
Farrah was delighted to have more that two eligible guys showing up on her tinder and Shea and Sasha were giggling away, helping her swipe through them.  
The ongoing argument was whether having a dog in one of their photos was an automatic swipe. Sasha and Farrah were very pro dog owner but Shea was more interested in 'other features'. With every drink, the swiping and chat had grown more raucous and Shea had even persuaded Farrah to upload a more 'flirty' profile pic. 

"Farrah's made their day. They never get to do that," Katya whispered to Trixie who was sitting beside her and looking on with an expression of bemusement.  
"I never thought in my whole life that a beautiful lesbian couple would be so entranced by swiping through frat boy dick..." Trixie replied, making Katya choke on her beer.

There was a sound of microphone feedback and a tall, dark haired woman with a guitar got onstage and started playing a slow ballad number. She was incredibly slim and dressed like an old movie star. Her voice was pleasant but singing didn't tend to hold Katya's interest. Farrah, however, was mesmerised. Her previous occupation was totally forgotten as she looked between the woman onstage and Trixie, excitedly.

"What you goggling for Tiny, spit it out?" Trixie raised an eyebrow at Farrah.  
"Trix... She looks like. You know..." Farrah stage-whispered and made a motion towards to woman onstage and then looked back at Trixie.  
Trixie just stared at the tiny blonde flapping her arms around, waiting for her to get to the point.  
"She just looks like... Yoooouuur typppeee..." Farrah drew out the last two words as if she was trying to communicate a secret message.

Unfortunately for Farrah, she was being the least subtle that anyone has ever been in their whole life ever.  
Katya was more interested in keeping her own rapidly thumping heart under control as she turned, along with the rest of the table to look curiously at Trixie's rapidly reddening face.  
Trixie liked women? Trixie liked women.

Trixie took a second but eventually took a breath, tossed her hair over one shoulder and muttered, "Jeez, you date one brunette one time and suddenly you have a type."  
"Trixie, I didn't mean that. I just meant that... Well... It ain't like back home... You're in Boston. If you wanted to... You could do what you like?" Farrah chirped away, faltering and trying to dig her way out of the hole as Trixie's eyes burned holes into her head.

There was an awkward silence over the table as Farrah finished her stuttering and Shea, ever the lifesaver, stood up, grabbing her purse and Sasha and offering another round.  
Farrah was on her feet in seconds, desperate to help them and escape in equal measure.  
Katya remained, frozen to her chair and Trixie sat alongside in stony silence, taking the odd sip of beer and watching them leave.  
It was a full minute until the silence was broken and, to Katya, it felt like a million years of heart palpitations.

"I know she was only trying to help and I was a bitch," Trixie stated, looking at the table.  
"Everyone's a bitch sometimes," Katya said softly.  
"I just don't want her feeling bad for me," Trixie replied.  
"I don't think she does. Why would she?" Katya asked, still talking gently, like Trixie might run at any moment.  
"She does. She always has someone and I'm always alone. She worries about me," Trixie explained, looking into Katya's eyes sadly.  
"That's crazy to me - " Katya replied.  
"It's just a sister thing. Sisters always worry," Trixie interjected, in a rush to explain.  
"No. It's not crazy that your sister worries about you. It's crazy that you're always alone," Katya replied slowly with a blush.  
"Oh."

Slowly, Trixie reached over to Katya's hand and squeezed it.

"Thanks. That's sweet," Trixie smiled.

In a moment of bravery, Katya moved her hand, flipping it over so she could hold Trixie's properly. Never letting her gaze leave Trixie's face, she squeezed gently.  
Trixie smirked in response, her eyes averted to the table.

"I'd never imagine you being shy," Katya said, her voice now just a whisper.  
"I might act like I know what I'm doin' but I'm a pussy cat really... That's what Farrah says anyway," Trixie replied, looking up to catch Katya's gaze.

Katya ran her thumb up and down Trixie's soft skin, enjoying the small payoff of Trixie shivering.

"You had me fooled," Katya smiled, thinking back to their previous interactions.  
"You're fun to get flustered," Trixie smirked back, winking.

The crowd in the bar broke into applause as the guitarist left the stage and second later, the group were back with the drinks. Katya moved to drop Trixie's hand, not wanting to cause her any more embarrassment.  
It was a pleasant surprise when Trixie just followed her hand and clasped it again under the table.  
It was even better that she kept it there for the rest of the night.


	6. Christmas Just Ain't Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is only really a half chapter.   
> It's the bit after you maybe meet someone you like and you have to engineer to get their number and find some excuse to text them and you're trying to get used to the way they type and their sense of humour and you can't tell if it's flirty or how long to wait for a message and blah blah blah.
> 
> Thank god Farrah is there with some common sense.

The moon in the darkness the very next eve  
Made me wish for a message I didn't receive

 

Barbie: Hey, It's Trix. Got your number from Sasha. Just wanted to say thanks again for last night.   
Barbie: I know we had to leave in a rush for the Uber but I had a great time. x

Katya: Hi Trixie, nice telephone number ya got there...  
Katya: I enjoyed it too. You should play next time though! x

Barbie: You're nuts when you're not shy. I could never. x

Katya: You should. Shea played me your music.  
Katya: Made all my Dolly dreams a reality. x

Barbie: Shut the hell up. Nuts. x

Katya: Well, if you change your mind, let me know. I'll come and sit in the front row. x

Barbie: Hey, you ever eat dinner? x

Katya: Yeah? I mean most days? It's usually like toast or cereal or whatever. I don't cook really? x  
Katya: How come? x

Barbie: Dumb.  
Barbie: You want to eat dinner sometime? x

Katya: Ahh. Gotcha.   
Katya: Yes please. x

 

Katya sat behind the booth staring at her phone. She was certain as she served each customer that she would look down to a reply and each time it never came, her stomach twisted into another knot.  
It seemed like a date. Definitely was a date. An offer of a date. A hint or a suggestion of a date.  
But it was five customers later and there was no reply.  
And no amount of staring at the black screen would make the message appear.

The night at open mic had ended abruptly. Farrah was trying to make sense of Uber and the taxi arrived after a minute causing the sisters to have to run out of the door.   
Katya really wanted to kiss Trixie. Just softly. Even once. She would have settled with a kiss on the cheek. Or even her hand.  
Katya had been forced to admit to herself (and Shea and Sasha) that she really liked Trixie. The girls obviously noticed the shift in the vibe between the two women and they had spent an extra half hour grilling her on the way home.

In theory, it was really interesting to have a crush again. It had been a LONG TIME since holding someones hand had made her heart fizzy. Like maybe not since grade school. In reality, the heart fizziness swung between pleasant and painful.  
Katya didn't recognise herself in these thoughts.  
Usually she would get her kicks from fucking a stranger in the ass with a strap-on.  
But Katya had felt dizzy walking home just thinking about kissing her rosy cheek.

After the queue of customers dried up without a reply, Katya found herself staring forlornly at the crepe stall.  
Farrah was perched scrolling her phone and, at one point, checking her lipstick out in the back of her metal spatula. There was no sign of Trixie. She hadn't been in all day.  
Katya sighed and looked down, absentmindedly doodling holly and ivy on some decorative luggage tags but snapped her head up when rapid movement caught the corner of her eye.  
Farrah was standing behind the counter snapping her fingers at her and waving, desperately trying to catch her attention.  
When she waved back, slow with confusion, Farrah frantically mimed a phone at her.  
Looking down, Katya found a notification from Instagram.

 

Farrahxoxo has sent you a message.

Looking up and grinning, she opened it.

 

Farrahxoxo: So you gonna ask my sister out or what? xo

Katya: You always try and set your sister up, Blondie?

Farrahxoxo: She likes you, idiot. I MADE her tell me...  
Farrahxoxo: You should ask her out. She's good fun when she isn't terrifying. xo

Katya: I know she's fun.  
Katya: She kind of suggested dinner and I said yes but she's gone quiet.   
Katya: Can't believe I'm messaging you about this. You can be TOO close to your siblings, you know?

Farrahxoxo: YES!  
Farrahxoxo: and shut up. She's my best friend. Who is bossy and scares me.  
Farrahxoxo: Ask her out properly! I bet she'll say yes! xo

Katya: What do you mean 'properly'? Like by carrier pigeon? Hand written invite? Fill out her dance card?  
Katya: It's not Edwardian times.

Farrahxoxo: I don't know what you're talking about! Speak normally. You and her are so freaking old oh my god!  
Farrahxoxo: Just be a bit old fashioned.  
Farrahxoxo: I know you guys are all feminist or whatever but just think romcom and ASK HER NICELY.  
Farrahxoxo: Oh my goodness it's so cold. WAIT. Maybe tomorrow it will snow!!!!!  
Farrahxoxo: It will be SO ROMANTIC IF IT SNOWS. xo

Katya: You are too much.

Farrahxoxo: So you'll ask her?! xo

Katya: Yes Farrah. I'll ask your sister out. Weirdo.

Farrahxoxo: YES! You two were SO CUTE the other night.  
Farrahxoxo: It was HEART EYESSSSS. xo

 

Katya looked up from her phone to see Farrah dancing and blowing kisses in her direction from behind her counter.  
She rolled her eyes in return but couldn't help grinning a little bit. It was kind of adorable that she was so excited for her big sister.  
Taking one deep breath, Katya pulled out her phone and started typing.

 

Katya: I would like to formally request your presence at dinner with me at a cute little diner I know. If you would be so generous as to accept my bold invitation, I could meet you tomorrow after your shift and escort you there? Kind regards, K Zamolodchikova x

Barbie: Sounds great but you type like an insane person. Am I safe? xx

Katya: If I were you I'd take a crash helmet.   
Katya: Seriously though, I can't wait. x

Barbie: Me neither. x

 

Katya couldn't stop smiling as she started clearing up the booth, packing everything back into their watertight containers.  
She even found herself humming away tunelessly and every time she looked up for a second, Farrah was giving her thumbs up and making hearts with her hands. At one point she even swore that Farrah did the mime where she pretended to walk down the stairs behind her counter...  
Maybe her project for next week would be finding Skipper a boyfriend to take out her excess energy on.

She locked up and pulled her jacket and scarf around her tightly. It did seem like it might snow tonight.  
Feeling a vibration from her pocket, she noticed another message.

 

Barbie: Why did Farrah just send me a million heart eye emojis? x


	7. Merry Christmas Darling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just kiss already...

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,  
But a beautiful woman, intentions quite clear...

 

"Trixxiiieeee, Katya is heeerrreee," Farrah singsonged through the back door of their booth.

"Just tell her to come through, I'm almost ready," Trixie replied from behind the door.

"You may enter..." Farrah said, opening the door for Katya, ushering her inside while wiggling her eyebrows.

 

Trixie had one foot up on a box and was leaned over to tie up her winter boots. Katya valiantly tried to avert her eyes but couldn't help staring at her ass. It was glorious. Jesus...

"Sorry about Farrah, she's been like that for the past 24 hours..." Trixie said, straightening up and pulling on a thick jacket.  
"She has been crazy but I think it's kind of cute. Shea is LOVING it..." Katya grinned.  
Trixie turned around and smiled wearily.  
"I love her but I can't wait to escape tonight. Between her and Auntie T, I've been asked a million questions I had no intention of answering," Trixie replied.  
"How many questions do I get?" Katya smirked.  
"One. And that was it..." Trixie gave her signature cackle and grabbed Katya's arm pulling her out of the booth and off out into the newly fallen snow.

 

Katya watched Trixie and wondered how it was possible she looked this good in diner lighting.  
The glowing green neon from the window didn't make her look sickly. The fluorescent tubes didn't wash her out. She looked radiant. More colourful than the Formica surfaces and more dazzling than the various 'retro' props embellished with LEDs and crystals. Katya couldn't imagine any lighting she would look bad in.  
Her make up was beautiful and she was wearing a pink shirt with bolo ties. It was achingly camp country but slightly provocative with how it was fitted over her large chest. Katya found herself having to correct her gaze on several occasions to stop herself drooling. If God was good, Katya thought, she'd get to worship her properly some day.  
The conversation was actually almost flowing. She had gotten over most of her nervousness and quickly realised that making Trixie laugh was both easy and rewarding.  
This icing on the cake was that Trixie also actually ate food which was sweet relief and Katya loved watching her demolish a veggie burger and fries.

Katya was in heaven.

"Hey creep. What are ya thinking over there?" Trixie interrupted her train of thought.  
"Ehh... I'm just really enjoying myself. I like that you eat food," Katya blurted.  
Trixie looked at her with one eyebrow raised.  
"Everyone eats food Katya," she teased.  
"No... I mean... I just like... I have to hang around with Shea and Sasha who survive off of wine, hummus and green juice. I just like being with someone who actually eats," Katya replied, reddening rapidly and giggling away stupidly at Trixie's incredulous expression.  
Eventually, Trixie cracked and began to laugh too before grabbing Katya's hand across the table.  
"I know something you'll really like..." she pouted flirtily and batted her eyelids. The way she pressed her tits together made her mouth go dry.  
"Wha-at..." Katya stuttered a little at the sudden change in direction.  
"Let's order dessert!," Trixie burst into laughter and Katya couldn't help but fully choke, flailing and smacking the table with her spare hand.

An hour later and they were walking along the wintry streets, holding onto one another so as not to skid on the frosty ground.  
Trixie was right in the middle of a story about her disastrous prom night and Katya was listening enraptured, trying not to be distracted by her close proximity and arm wrapped around her waist.

"... so I'm there with Max who is, like, the only other gay guy in our town and everyone is asking us whether we're gonna kiss. So he comes up with the bright idea to play 7 minutes in heaven and we end up in the CLOSET together, not kissin' and... I mean... We couldn't even laugh about it with each other until about two years down the line because we were so deep in denial. It was hilarious! We were in the freaking CLOSET," she exclaimed and they both wheezed and staggered their way along the street.

"So who was your first kiss, Barbie? Some sexy farmer's daughter?" Katya asked, still giggling.  
"Right... You're not allowed to laugh," Trixie said solemnly, but still with that beautiful smile on her face.  
"Scouts honour," Katya replied, holding up her salute.  
"Well I've only properly kissed one person. She was called Violet and she was in town visiting her Grandma for New Year last year. She came to a gig I was playing in the bar and we kissed a little outside beside some old kegs," Trixie admitted softly.

Katya stopped walking and turned around to face her.

"One person?" she said in disbelief.  
"HEY. Scouts honour, you promised!," Trixie squealed. "Besides, maybe it was a little less ladylike than kissing..."

Katya gave a faux gasp at Trixie's giggly admission and whirled her round, walking down the road again.

"I'm just glad someone in that town did the right thing and gave you some kisses... That's all I'm gonna say," Katya replied, squeezing Trixie's waist softly with her gloved hand.  
"Oh. Wow," Trixie said softly, suddenly bashful.  
"I'm just saying... Anytime," Katya trailed off and smiled as Trixie tilted her head to rest it on her shoulder.

Katya could feel the blonde hair tickling her nose but you couldn't have paid her a million dollars to shake Trixie off.

"Bet you've kissed plenty of girls," Trixie said quietly.  
"A few. No real girlfriends though. Just dating really," Katya replied, equally as quietly.  
"You never wanted one?" Trixie asked.  
Katya took a moment to think about the question.  
"I never really thought about it when I was younger. It took me a long time to grow up and sort myself out. I'm beginning to though... I see Shea and Sasha and they're so happy together. Shea says it makes everything better. I'd like that," Katya said, trying desperately not to ramble.  
"That's the first time I've really met a gay couple out in the open like that. It felt so normal. I'd like that, I think," Trixie mused, slowly.  
"I can't see you struggling. Not here, anyway," Katya said.

Katya realised that their steps were getting slower, their voices softer with each reply. Trixie was holding onto her so tightly, pressed up against her. Her voice was the softest she had ever heard it, all trace of brashness gone.

"You've been sweet to me," Trixie pretty much whispered.  
"Sasha told me I'm infatuated," Katya grumbled lowly.

"Me too, a little..." 

Katya stopped and turned towards Trixie, wrapping her other arm around her waist to join the first, pulling her close and burying her face in her neck.  
Trixie was so soft and warm and her neck smelled like sweet perfume. She felt Trixie hands on her shoulders, holding her even closer and a soft kiss was pressed into her hair.

She pulled back a little.

"Can I kiss you, Trix?" she asked, staring into her big, brown eyes.

Trixie just nodded and leaned in slowly, allowing Katya to take the lead and close the gap. Their lips met gently and Katya couldn't believe the jolt that went through her body.  
She was kissing the most beautiful woman she had ever met.  
Trixie pressed a little harder and Katya opened her mouth a little, allowing the kiss to deepen.  
The most perfect soft sigh came from Trixie and Katya found herself pushing down a smile that would break the spell.  
Eventually though, they drifted away from each other, both with hazy eyes and big smiles.

"Let me walk you home so I can kiss you a little more?" Katya asked, earnestly.  
"You're not going to try and get me into bed, huh?" Trixie replied, eyebrow raised.  
"Not tonight. Not yet," Katya grinned and Trixie beamed back at her.

They started walking, arms wrapped around each other again. Two blocks down, Trixie broke the silence.

"So does that mean you want to see me again?" she smirked.  
"Definitely. And just to be clear... It's not that I don't want you in bed. I do. A lot. Just so you know. For future reference," Katya said slowly and purposefully.

"Good..."

When they finally got to Trixie's front door, they kissed like teenagers. Staying out of sight of the windows, they let their defences down, fully making out. Trixie received more than one giggly warning for the beautiful but loud whines and moans that escaped from her mouth.  
Katya desperately wanted to give in. To unzip their huge coats and feel her soft body.  
But she controlled herself.

She knew that she dreamed about having Trixie in a million places, in a million ways but the first time had to be something special.

They broke apart, their shaking breaths foggy up the freezing air around them.  
"Meet me for lunch tomorrow?" Katya asked.  
"Please," Trixie replied, smiling ear to ear and squeezing their hands before heading up the stairs and into the building.

Fuck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter, we get a little down and dirty again...


	8. Baby It's Cold Outside

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the grand scheme of the world, this isn't too NSFW.  
> And we even get a little from Trix' point of view...

With a little self love, so lively and quick,  
I knew in a moment I needed fake dick...

Trixie lay in bed in the spare room for the first time since she had arrived at Auntie T's house.   
On all the previous nights, she and Farrah had curled up in the same room. They often had to share rooms and beds growing up in their tiny, overcrowded house and in this new place, it was nice to have the familiarity of her little sister. It was even better now she was a little older and had stopped punching and kicking in her sleep.

But there were things on her mind tonight that she needed to be all alone for.

The way Katya looked at her when they pulled apart tonight was so hungry. Trixie had never seen anything like it. And she had felt her body respond immediately. She was sorely tempted to say fuck it all and go lay with Katya. To feel her strong hands and fiery gaze all over her as she lay pliant, wet and wanting would be perfect.  
But aside from that night of passion behind the bar and countless nights alone with her hand, Trixie knew she lacked the experience that Katya was probably used to.  
Even the night with Violet had been a pretty transaction. They both brought each other off hard and efficiently. Trixie fully remembered how Violet ground her little pussy with the strip of soft black hair against her thigh as she rubbed Trixie roughly. She had pressed her other hand over Trixie's whining mouth so they could be in secret. She had thought it over a million times. It lacked romance which she regretted a little but at least her first time had been exciting and pleasurable.  
She couldn't imagine the embarrassment if she got in bed with Katya and couldn't bring her pleasure.

But on the other hand, if it felt anything like their make out session, maybe she didn't need to worry. Everything so far had felt perfectly natural. They were, essentially, beasts after all. If a cow could figure it out, she sure as shit could. But the slight nervousness still tingled.

Thinking about giving it all to Katya, she let her hand slip beneath her nightgown and brush over the wet triangle of hair between her legs.

Trixie knew she got wet. Violet had commented on it. Said she'd never seen a pussy drip like hers. It had made her feel a mixture of mortification and pride.  
She knew, privately, the wetness felt good. She loved the feeling of her own slick fingers and it had certainly made everything more comfortable when she got a little stage fright while laying back, legs open on that keg all those months ago...  
She imagined Katya's various reactions. Would she be wide eyed, turned on by it? Would it be too much?

She rubbed her fingers against her wet opening, imagining someone else's instead and swirled her juices over her clit, relishing the deep shudder.

Trixie had watched Katya for the last week. Lifting heavy boxes of merchandise out of the back of her truck with her strong arms. Even watching her drive the truck made Trixie a little wet. She dreamed of Katya driving her around, one arm out of the window and piloting the car with one powerful hand grasping the wheel.  
She loved the way she was a little shy around her. She loved it even more when Shea and Sasha had told her in hysterics that they had never seen Katya bumble about the way she had been.  
She even loved that Katya had tried to avoid her. The not-so-subtle way she changed directions or took convenient break slots in order to avoid her. Obviously, it was also annoying but it was sweet.  
There was just something about Katya that was sweet and sexy at the same time. Trixie enjoyed getting to see more sides of her. Especially when she had kissed her up against the wall...

Her clit was beginning to tingle non stop and Trixie removed her hand. She didn't want to finish yet.

Trixie had looked up the collective the first day she had met Katya. She was shocked at the idea of a whole art company fully of queer women! Their projects looked strange and beautiful but she never felt dumb for not understanding. She did give props to their social media person who made it all seem like one big hippy romp in the sun. Or snow at this time of year...  
She had almost had a heart attack when she saw one of the posters for a previous installation.

The poster had a black background with Katya's upper body and face in the shot. Her hair was wet and slicked back off her face which was clean of her usual black and red makeup look. Her green blue eyes were so striking against her pale skin. She looked like marble.  
Her torso had been splattered with red paint, tiny flecks of it spreading up across her collar bone and even some spattered across her face.  
Trixie had flipped at the sight of the droplets of paint running down her breasts. The rest of the day was spent with her legs pressed together and trying not to make eye contact with Katya.  
So today when they were making out in their winter layers, Trixie couldn't help herself imagining how she would look above her. Or below her. Trixie wanted to kiss and suck and touch every inch of her chest.

She couldn't help herself, her pussy was clenching at the thought of it. Trixie reached her hand back down and started to tease her pussy again. She worked herself right up to the edge, panting and whining a little, enjoying the wet noises of her pleasure.  
Then she stopped again.  
She could wait one more time, she reckoned.

She closed her eyes and waited for the tension to subside.  
In a hippy world like that and with all those partners she had talked about, Katya would surely know what to do. Trixie almost groaned aloud at the thought of the shorter woman taking the lead.  
Trixie wondered, smirking, if she had any little fetishes that she liked. She wondered if she would like them too.

Living in such close quarters with family, Trixie hadn't felt comfortable keeping anything sexual in the house. She knew Farrah had some toys hidden in the boot of her car but Trixie couldn't bare the shame of her Mom or siblings coming across anything. Now she was in her twenties, she should really be figuring something else out. She couldn't be the town spinster, denying everything about herself and looking after her Mom and siblings forever.  
What would it be like to live somewhere alone? Somewhere that she could be a bit more open about who she liked? Somewhere she could find someone?  
She realised that after just a couple of weeks in Boston, she had that.

Maybe Katya would find her lack of experience interesting, Trixie mused. Helping someone learn how to orgasm in different ways? It sounded like some porno or something.  
She imagined Katya with her fingers, her tongue, a vibrator, a strap...  
Trixie didn't stop her fingers this time.

She curled them inside her pussy with one hand, hearing the sopping noise that meant she was close and she increased her pace, frantically rubbing her clit, feelings the sparks.  
Trixie bit down on her lip to stop her moans when she felt her pussy spray a little against her arm and her whole body shuddered in rolls of pleasure. She could feel herself pulsing from the tips of her clenched toes to her eyes that rolled back in her head.

When she came to in the damp patch, she realised the obvious.  
There was no way she was going home after Christmas...

 

As soon as Katya had come in the door, she stripped off her clothes and dove into bed. The walk home had been too much. Visions of Trixie kissing her, teasing her lips with her naughty tongue, mewling like a cat in heat.  
God Katya had been so so desperate for her and her 'situation' had only got more urgent on the stroll back.

Reaching into the drawer beside her, Katya pulled out her favourites. Her dildo and a small bullet. She was going all in tonight. She had demonstrated the upmost self control and now she was going to lose it, by herself, in her bed.

Turning on the bullet, she ran it over her lips sending little sparks shooting around her tummy.   
Katya didn't do much grooming but she always made sure to remove the hair around her pussy lips. They were so sensitive when they were bare and the buzz of the vibrator against them felt so soothing. Katya let her head fall back, murmuring her enjoyment of the tickling sensation.  
She ran her finger through her wet folds, approving of her body's reaction.

The vibe felt good on her pussy but electric the second it touched her clit.   
Katya loved her clit. She had always got the most intense orgasms when she focused on it. It was slightly bigger than average, she knew, and when she was aroused it would peep out of it's hood. She ran the bullet in circles around it.  
Fuck she wanted Trixie to suck it.  
The thought was there before Katya even realised what she had done. She was fully soaked now imagining Trixie's big pink lips wrapped around her sensitive nub.  
She ran the vibrator over it again and again imagining how Trixie could suck her and rub her. She could probably cum with that alone. But if she grazed it with her teeth... Fuuucckk.

Katya grabbed her dildo, changing pace and fucking it into herself slowly. It was slightly larger than average, made of black silicone and shaped at the end to hit her g spot. She hated the ones that looked like actual dicks. The appeal of this one was the shape that made her feel all sorts of good ways without a weird fake vein in sight.  
She thrust it inside her and tightened her pussy round it, feeling every inch breaching her. She loved pulling it right out before pushing it in again, feeling the ring of muscles give into the silicone member over and over as she gave herself what she wanted.  
God she wanted to do this to Trixie.  
Wanted to watch her little whines get out of control as she fucked her.

Katya fucked herself with one hand and pressed the bullet against her clit with the other. She wasn't holding back now.  
She could feel the tightening in her stomach as she aggressively thrust inside, rubbing her clit furiously.  
The string snapped inside her and she let out a long moan as she felt everything clench hard.

Out of breath, Katya lay back, shattered.  
In total, her session had lasted five minutes... Far too quick to pretend that her arousal was about anything other than Trixie.  
She smiled and rolled over in bed, depositing her toys on the floor.

Katya: Tonight was Houdini level magical, can't stop thinking about you Barbie.  
Katya: Still see you tomorrow, yeah?

Barbie: I knew you had plans to cuff me, put me in a straight jacket and throw me in a locked box.  
Barbie: Shit... I meant magic. Magic tricks...

Katya: Jesus Christ Mattel, didn't realise you were a total deviant. Your dungeon or mine. ;) 

Barbie: Fuck off. I'm from Wisconsin. Serial killers basing their ploys around light entertainment are common in the midwest!

Katya: I know what you meant. I was teasing, doll. xx  
Katya: Seriously, though. I had a great time tonight.

Barbie: Me too. And if it helps I can't stop thinking about you either. xx  
Barbie: I'll come in past when I get my break? 

Katya: I would really like that.  
Katya: Sleep well xx


	9. I'll Be Home for Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trixie makes a big decision and Katya's friends are very supportive. Maybe too supportive...

More rapid than eagles her questions they came,  
And she giggled, and shouted, and teased them with names...

 

"So how was your date with baaeeeee?" Shea asked as the last customer in the queue went on their way.  
"You've been spending too much time with Farrah... Bae..." Katya chortled, studiously ignoring the question.  
"Nope, I'm a boring old married woman. I need the gossip. You're not getting away from the question. How was the date?" Shea asked, determinedly.

Katya turned away from the stockings she was filling a rack with and tried to think of a funny answer. Any humour escaped her.

"It was perfect," she huffed.  
"Oh my god. I have never seen you like this! You are bamboozled. Infatuated. Crushin'. Head over heels. Hot for Barbie," Shea slammed her hand down with every ridiculous word.  
"Infatuation. That's the word Trixie used," Katya murmured, turning back to her task.  
"Hang on! She told you she was 'infatuated'?!" Shea spun her back round, jaw dropping.  
"Yeah. Well. Kind of. I told her that Sasha said I was infatuated with her and she said she thought she was too... What's the big deal?" Katya rattled off the story.  
"The big deal is that you met at Christmas, went on a date in the snow, made sweet love and confessed your feelings! This is huge! It's like a rom -"  
"We didn't have sex," Katya interrupted.  
"You..." Shea took a breath and pointed at Katya's chest. "You. Katya. You didn't sleep with her?"

Shea was incredulous.

"Yeah. We just kissed goodnight at the door. I didn't want to push her too fast," Katya said softly.

Shea threw her hands in the air, whirling round to grab her bag.

"I'm phoning Sasha. Right now. I don't know what's happened to you but we are buying wedding hats and preparing speeches," Shea rummaged in her bag for her phone.  
"Jesus Shea, it's been one date. Chill out," Katya grumbled but as she turned back to her task she couldn't help but grin.

 

It was nice to have someone to talk about. She hadn't realised how worried her friends were about her. She hadn't felt lonely often. Loneliness was just a warning flare that it was time to start another class, hit the gym more or maybe work a little harder. Katya had never felt pressured to meet someone. But now she had, her friends seemed delighted. It was kind of nice.  
It was even nicer to see Trixie walk over to the booth about lunchtime, a coy smile on her face.  
She reached out to stroke Katya's hand over the counter top and Katya could feel Shea vibrate with excitement beside her.

**********

They ate lunch at the market, wandering around properly for the first time, checking out all the various stalls and products on offer.  
About halfway round, Katya slipped her arm through Trixie's, linking them together and they strolled happily through the melting snow.  
They continued past the market itself through the park and stopped on a bench under a canopy, squeezed together for warmth (or that was the excuse).

"I couldn't stop thinking about you last night," Trixie said slowly, looking out over the snow covered field.  
"Me neither," Katya replied, unable to stop herself smirking at the memory.  
"In that way?" Trixie smirked back.  
"In that way," Katya confirmed and they both snuggled a little closer, Katya wrapping her arm around Trixie's shoulders.

Trixie slumped down a little in the seat, allowing her head to rest against Katya's chest.

"I'm thinking about staying on with Auntie T for a while. She says that there's nothing for me at home and I'm beginning to agree," Trixie said softly.

Katya felt every muscle in her body freeze. It was excitement mostly, but also nerves, fear and determination not to let Trixie know how happy the thought made her.

"Auntie said she could get me an apprenticeship at the salon next door to her bakery. I could cut hair and work the bakery at weekends," Trixie continued.  
"I think it would be better for me than the farm. More opportunities," she stopped.

There was quiet for a minute.

"I want what's best for you, but it would be nice to have you here," Katya said softly, so quietly it could be easily missed.  
"I don't want to put pressure on whatever this is. It's not the reason why I want to stay. But maybe it's a reason I want to stay," Trixie replied just as softly. "After all, I would never ever find this back home. I don't want to be alone my whole life."  
"Whether you want to be with me or not, I'm here to help whatever you decide," Katya said thoughtfully. "I like you and I want to date you and I'd feel weird about dating you if I knew we were going to have to call it off as soon as December 26th rolled around..."

Katya stopped, realising she had gone from thoughtful sensible statements to rambling very very quickly.  
Trixie just giggled.

"You gonna date me then?" Trixie asked.  
"I'm gonna date the crap out of you," Katya replied.  
"And is this country dating where you're my sweetheart or is this city dating where you get back on tinder after we finish dinner?" Trixie sat up and looked at Katya, her face a mixture of thoughtful and teasing.  
"Oh, I think if I'm dating the one country girl who's prettier than Dolly herself, I have to be your sweetheart..." Katya held Trixie tightly and reached for her hand.  
"You're nuts if you think I'm prettier than Dolly!," Trixie squealed.  
"Hmmm. Let's be scientists for a minute. If you were to add up all the time I spend trying not to stare at you, it would probably add up to a year. Even though I've only known you a couple of weeks. That means you are definitely prettier than Dolly," Katya joked.  
"I don't think your maths is right. You need to check your workin'," Trixie said, an eyebrow raised.  
"I never said I was a GOOD scientist. More like Beaker from the muppets," Katya snorted.  
"I'd be Janice," Trixie giggled back.  
"You'd totally be Janice..."

Trixie leaned forward and kissed Katya softly on the cheek. The warmth of the kiss prickled at Katya's cold, pink cheeks.

"So you gonna be my sweetheart, Janice?" Katya asked.  
"I would like that very much..."

************

The rest of the day passed in a flash.  
She sold a million trinkets, smiling the whole time, getting nudges from Shea about what a dork she was being.  
When Sasha turned up to take over, she received a little more gentle bullying about her 'sweetheart' but nothing could bring her down off her cloud.

"We have to celebrate, Zamo!," Shea said as Katya pulled her coat around her.  
"It's been ONE DATE," Katya said emphatically.  
"TWO DATES and she's NOT LEAVING," Shea replied, mocking her tone.  
"Why don't you both come round to the flat for drinks tonight? Farrah can come too? Just a few drinks, a small cheese plate, some music... I promise it will be chill," Sasha suggested softly, trying to play good cop to Shea's insane cop.  
"I dunno..." Katya stalled.  
"It's what you would do anyway. You're just bringing her to your everyday life?" Sasha pointed out.  
"Ok..."

Shea punched the air and Sasha smiled softly.  
"See you at eight," Shea declared, waving her off.

**********

By midnight, the laughter was plentiful and Shea's embarrassing stories were coming thick and fast.  
Farrah was long gone to meet AJ, some cute guy from tinder who apparently sent 'the most incredible nudes' and Kasha had grumbled off to bed around ten, blaming old age and the cold.  
Trixie sat in Katya's lap in an old squishy armchair, squeezing her and cackling with laughter every time Shea mentioned another dumb thing Katya had done in her youth.  
Usually, Katya would hate this kind of relentless embarrassment but having Trixie pressed against her made her not care at all. Shea could reveal everything about her and as long as Trixie's ass and thick thighs were curled around her, Katya couldn't give less of a shit.

"Shea can you come with me and choose another bottle of wine?" Sasha asked pointedly and motioned through to the kitchen.  
Shea looked confused for a moment until she understood the not-subtle-even-in-the-slightest undertones of her question.  
When they left, Trixie turned more towards Katya.

"I don't think I should drink anymore," Trixie said.

She was smiling, so relaxed and soft and draped over Katya in the most soothing way.

"Why not, Barbie?" Katya asked, equally as mellowed out.  
"I want to do more than kiss ya tonight. I don't wanna be blitzed," Trixie said, slyly.  
"Trixie Mattel. Are you saying you want to CANOODLE with me?" Katya said in faux shock.  
"Even country folks don't say 'canoodle' but yeah, I've been cosied up to you all night and I'm feelin' like a furnace," Trixie chastised.  
"Excuse me, how you do think I feel with you all pressed against me? It's like heaven and hell all mixed up in one!," Katya replied.  
"I could move?" Trixie raised her eyebrow.

"Don't. You. Dare," Katya wrapped her arms around Trixie's tiny waist, holding her tight and tickling her a little.

If Katya liked her sitting on her lap, she loved her squirming around, giggling and gasping as she continued to tickle her sides.  
It was like all her Christmases had come at once.  
She didn't even notice Shea and Sasha standing in the doorway, smiling and looking at them starry eyed.  
Katya stopped and coughed, going beet red and Trixie, noticing that they had been caught, went equally as scarlet.

"Young love, huh?" Sasha said softly.  
"Nothing about Katya's much young..." Trixie quipped and the room was, once more, alive with laughter.  
"I think we're gonna head, girls. Thanks so much for making me so welcome," Trixie took advantage of the break in the giggling and stood up, pulling Katya with her.

They all bid goodbye and Katya and Trixie layered up to prepare for the two block walk back to her place.

"Don't do anything we wouldn't do," Shea managed to shout through the door before Sasha pulled her away, scolding and closed the door.

Katya was burning despite the cold. They both were.  
They were both desperate to do anything they could do.  
The two girls took off walking towards Katya's at speed. Fast moving in the slow falling snow.


	10. Santa Baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After bold and valiant attempts to hold off on the physical for all of their two dates, the decision is made that it's definitely time to do some fucking. If you've ever worked a Christmas job, you'll know that trying to have willpower in that regard is almost pointless. Or maybe it's just the places that everyone I've ever met has worked over winter. There's something about the smell of cinnamon and everywhere being freezing all the time.

Now, baby. Now, closer. Now, harder and firm...  
Grind on me, kiss me, writhe, thrust and squirm...

 

'Is it possible she's just perfect in every way?'

Katya wondered the question over and over to herself as she piloted Trixie towards her building. The whole way home, Trixie had held onto her with her mittened hands, keeping them close. They were one force against the elements. A giggly force. But one force all the same. With one goal.

To get home and in bed as soon as possible.

Katya's cold and excited hands shook as she tried to get the keys lined up with the lock and Trixie's steady grasp helped her guide it in. The door popped open and suddenly, they were both inside, the frost insistent on following them by clinging to their eyelashes and hair.  
For some dumb reason, Katya had imagined this as the grand climax of some romantic Christmas film where they would fall into each other's arms and melt together in the hallway, unable to tear apart from one another to move to another room.  
What actually followed was between five and ten minutes of deeply unsexy getting out of winter clothes. The boots with thick soles and laces that had to be yanked off, the huge jackets and scarves and hats which needed to be peeled away and spread over various radiators around the apartment to dry out over night and not to mention the many varied sock layers.  
By the time the two women were free of their soaking outer layers, they were nearly too cold and tired to get up to much else.

Nearly.

Katya finished hanging the last of the socks over her drying rack and felt Trixie's hands sneak around her waist from behind, tentative and exploratory.

"Hey Barbie," Katya said softly, leaning back into the embrace.  
"Hey... If you're quite done being the perfect housewife, maybe you wanna come curl up with me?" Trixie asked softly, nosing through Katya's damp hair.  
"That sounds nice," Katya turned in her arms so they were facing each other, backing Trixie towards the bedroom, through the doorway and onto the bed.

The kissing would never get old. Trixie's lips were so soft, slick and plush. She was always ready to be kissed and Katya was always more than willing to do it.  
But tonight what was getting to Katya were the little moans and whimpers coming from Trixie's lips as they kissed. Tonight they didn't have to be quiet or polite and every single one of Trixie's noises was going straight to Katya's pussy.  
The noises only got more desperate when Katya straddled her, pushing her back onto the bed, their bodies pressed tightly together.

"Baby, those noises... Tell me what you need?" Katya gasped, breaking their kisses for a second.  
Trixie met her eyes for a moment, her cheeks flushed. She opened her mouth but no words came out.  
"Are you ok, Trix? We don't have to do anything if you're not ready," Katya said softly, stroking her plump cheek with her thumb.  
"No Kat... I'm ready. I know I'm ready. I know what I'd do on my own but I just don't know what to ask for," she replied softly, breaking eye contact and blushing even more.

Katya looked down at the beautiful woman beneath her. Trixie was still squirming slightly, gripping Katya's thighs, her pupils dilated and cheeks rosy red. Katya knew desperation when she saw it but she also saw inexperience and anxiety.  
She bent down and kissed her softly, climbing off and encouraging Trixie to move up the bed with her so they were lying side by side, wound together, amongst the displaced comforter and pile of pillows. Trixie deserved to feel taken care of. These little seeds of insecurity were going to go away and Katya was going to show her exactly how she felt about her.

"Do you trust me to make you feel good?" Katya said softly, running her fingers up and down the peaks and valleys of Trixie's body.  
Trixie shivered on the bed next to her.  
"Please..."

Katya began by pressing slow kisses into Trixie's neck as she undressed her. She ignored the frantic pounding in her own crotch as she slipped off Trixie's shirt and industrial level bra, allowing her large, soft breasts to spill to either side of her sternum. Katya traced her fingers around them, cupping gently and watching Trixie squirm as she traced her puckered pink nipples. She was perfect. Skin smooth and sweet, so pale beneath all those winter layers. It was tempting to leave a couple of nips, bruises that would turn purple against the milky white skin but Katya decided there was plenty time for that. For now, she continued her trail of kisses across her breasts, around her areolas, up and down her chest. Each press of her lips earned her another whimper from Trixie and these turned to moans when she sucked softly on each hardened nipple.  
It was better than she dreamed, pulling these noises from Trixie. Her hands continued to massage her nipples as her lips continued exploring her soft belly, the little creases of rolls for her to softly bite and kiss. Katya had only dreamed of such a heavenly women. As she nosed around her tummy, she felt Trixie's fingers work their way into her hair, clasping her head as her body tensed and she whined even more. Katya was at church and she was worshipping. Her lips singing hymns and her fingers reaching for the salvation of Trixie's heavenly body.  
Against every instinct, she stopped to pull her hands away and placed Trixie's hands at her own waistband.

She didn't need the encouragement. Trixie moved faster than light, pulling off the remainder of her clothing until she sat up, naked, beautiful in front of Katya, panting.

"Baby..." Katya moved towards her, climbing atop her again, pushing her back into the mattress, hungry for her.   
"You are so beautiful," she whispered, pressing kisses to her earlobe.

Katya let her hand trace down her body until it reached Trixie's mound. She pulled back a little until Trixie gave her a hungry nod with a whimper and she continued.

Trixie was soaked.  
Katya had never felt anything like it. So plush and wet, with just one touch, Katya's fingertips were covered in her.  
She couldn't help but look up in surprise and awe, catching Trixie's flushed expression.

"Please tell me you know how hot this is?" Katya whispered as she breathed out, leaning close to Trixie's face and sucking her fingers clean, relishing the taste.  
Trixie just whimpered a little more and Katya felt Trixie's hips pressed upwards against her own.  
"Let me eat you out, Trixie. Please?" Katya continued, dipping her fingers again and taking another taste.  
"Please..." Trixie's voice was hoarse now, her eyes fluttering, her back beginning to arch up off the bed. Her entire body flinching with every tiny bit of contact Katya gave her.  
"Good girl," Katya praised and moved down her body to settle between her legs.

If Katya was worshipping Trixie's body, there aren't words for what she wanted to do to glorify her pussy.   
She ran her finger tips across it, pushing and pressing lightly, delighted with every shift of Trixie's hips or sharp inhale of breath from above her head.  
Everything about it was inviting. The soft pink folds, her dainty clit, the curls of soft hair, now drenched with desire. She nosed gently at the wetness before swiping her tongue gently through the slick folds.  
Trixie moaned somewhere above her and Katya buried her face deeper, licking and sucking. She tasted beautiful, musky and silky on her tongue and it only made Katya eat her out more ravenously. Licking firmly into her opening, she heard a loud whine so she pressed her tongue inside over and over, drawing sopping wet sounds to spur her on further.

Pulling back slightly, Katya sucked two fingers and looked up at Trixie's red face. Her fists and toes scrunched up and whole body rigid and twitching with pleasure.  
Slowly, Katya pushed her fingers inside her, pressing upwards and rubbing in and out. She watched Trixie's face contort more and whine with pleasure before she lowered her head and began to suck gently on her clit.

"More..." Trixie moaned from above and Katya grinned against Trixie's mound.

Katya pressed harder and thrust a little faster, sucked a little harder, taking little breaks to lick at the moisture which pooled around her knuckles.  
Trixie's thighs were shaking where they were bracketing her head and Katya quickened her pace ever more, desperate to push Trixie over the edge.

"Oh Lord... Katya... I'm cumming..." Trixie mewled from above and her whole body went slack, her pussy clenching, milking at Katya's fingers.  
Dewy liquid spilled from her pussy and Katya licked at it gently, revelling in the taste.

When she moved her hand, Trixie shivered and Katya climbed back up, pulling the comforter with her to cosy them both in the bed.  
She pulled Trixie into her arms and pressed a small kiss against her forehead.

"Was that ok, Sweetheart?" Katya whispered.  
"I've never felt anything like it," Trixie mumbled, her voice still a little horse and fucked out.  
"Well, don't get too comfortable. It's just the first of the night..." Katya teased, tracing shapes against her spine.  
"You're really good at this Katya. I'm worried I'm not gonna be much good at this," Trixie whispered against her chest, tensing up.  
"What if I promise to be really, really vocal?" Katya tilted Trixie's chin up and grinned down at her.  
"Maybe if you boss me a little at first, I can figure it out after that?" Trixie grinned back, shyly.  
"You wanna be bossed around Barbie? That doesn't seem like my sweet, innocent, farm girl?" Katya said in a goofy voice, bringing her hand down softly on Trixie's ass.  
"I don't know if I'm much innocent anymore... If I had my way, we would never leave this bed..."  
"Wouldn't hear any complaints from me," Katya sat up slowly, stretching tall above her head and yawning.

She pulled off her shirt and the small cropped bralette, stretching her back and rotating her shoulder before snuggling back down and pulling Trixie back against her chest.  
Trixie gently trailed her fingers over Katya's toned stomach and up across her clavicle.

"You can't just do that and expect me not to lose my mind," Trixie whispered against her neck, making every hair on her body stand on end.  
"I can promise you that the intention was just to get comfortable but I'm flattered my old skeleton corpse has that effect on you," Katya giggled, pulling Trixie in tighter and kissing into her hair.  
"You're so fit... I didn't know what was hiding under all those baggy jumpers..." Trixie smirked back walking her fingers deliberately across Katya's abs.  
"You're sweet to say so,".  
"Katya, lose the leggings please," Trixie said. Katya noted the heated look in her eyes.  
"Yes Maam...".

Katya scrambled out of her leggings and lay back down, patting her chest to encourage Trixie to lie back against her.

"I've never touched someone else before," she heard Trixie say softly, as she felt hands stroking up her thigh and curling to hold her hip.  
"I thought... that time..." Katya stuttered.  
"Nuh-uh. You'd kinda be my first that way," Trixie replied. This time her voice didn't sound nervous as much as it did teasing, like she knew exactly the effect her words would have on Katya.

Trixie squeezed her hip gently and slid her hand down to cup Katya through her underwear. She propped herself up slightly on her other elbow and smirked down at Katya, who could feel her face reddening.  
Not shifting her burning gaze for a second, Katya felt her teasing touch slip underneath her cotton underwear, rubbing her folds as gentle as a whisper. To Trixie's obvious delight, Katya had whimpered a little and she pressed a little harder, sliding one finger between her lips.

"You gonna boss me," Trixie asked slyly, after a few tentative minutes.  
"I don't know if you need much bossing at all, baby. You're doing just fine," Katya groaned, grinding into Trixie's touch.  
"You've always been so shy and sweet to me but, from what Shea was saying, you ain't usually... Boss me, Mama," Trixie said with a low, slow voice, pupils dilated like saucers. 

Trixie couldn't have picked better words.  
Katya felt a growl form in her throat and her hips instinctively jerked up.  
She pulled her cotton underwear off frantically and grabbed Trixie's hand in her own before lying flat on her back.

"Tap my pussy, like this," Katya growled, cupping Trixie's hand and showing her what to do.  
Katya showed the motion of gently slapping against her pussy and clit before giving a little circular rub and repeating, moaning at the sensation of Trixie's hand against her.  
"Good girl, keep going," Katya pulled her hand away, rubbing her own fingers over her sensitive nipples while Trixie continued to provide sharp little slaps.  
"This ok, Mama," Trixie purred after a little while, causing Katya to moan.  
"Mhmmm. So good baby. Harder please," Katya whimpered and the firmer slaps were quickly softened and soothed by her increasing wetness.

Katya continued to encourage Trixie with little praises until she lost herself in pleasure entirely, only able to focus on each little sting on her clit that was rapidly requiring more attention. She could feel the heat building in her stomach and threw her head back, enjoying the waves of pleasure travelling her body.

"Rub Mama's clit," she eventually choked out as Trixie purred a 'yes' and giggled darkly in her ear.

Trixie began to rub slow circles against Katya's swollen clit, dipping down occasionally to bring wetness up over it with a pass of her fingers.  
Katya felt her orgasm pull at her more urgently when suddenly, Trixie brought a small slap with two fingers down directly onto her clit. Heaven was the only was to described the sensation she felt and Katya let out a groan, canting her hips toward the ceiling.  
Trixie circled her fingers again, faster this time and Katya knew she was growing close.

"You gonna cum for me Mama?" her beautiful whimper against her ear.

With another quick slap against her clit, Katya was writhing and panting and cumming hard, moaning Trixie's name.

It took a second for her to come back down to earth but she came to with Trixie kissing her neck and cupping her pulsing pussy, murmuring praise against her hot skin.

"Thankyou baby," Katya whispered.  
"I liked doing it," Trixie replied simply, giving a couple more small kisses before cuddling in closely.  
"I like that look you get in your eyes when you know you're gonna say something filthy," Katya smirked.

Trixie hummed in response and when she looked back up at Katya, her eyes were still blown wide open. She shifted closer and Katya could feel the warmth radiating from her.

"Something you want, baby girl?" Katya smiled, pinching Trixie's soft pink cheeks.  
"Yes Mama..." Trixie mewled, shifting her thighs to grind a little against Katya's hip.  
"Why don't you show me?" Katya asked, pulling Trixie's ass towards her so they were pressed tightly together and grabbing her beautifully manicured hand, pushing it to where Trixie's needed it most.  
"I don't know... You really wanna watch me? I'm not very wild," Trixie said softly, tinges of insecurity weaving into her voice.  
"Yes, baby. Show me exactly how much you missed me the other night," Katya said firmly.

As Trixie started to move and grind against her hip and her hand, Katya muttered encouragement, listening to what made her whimper.  
Trixie, it seemed, wanted to be a good little girl and a dirty little girl. Loved to be praised and softly demeaned. What she seemed to respond most to, though, was Katya taking control. When Mama asked her to do something, Trixie would whine sweetly and grind needily against her side, taking all instruction without question.  
It wasn't as if Katya had been waiting around, desperate for someone to dominate but she had to admit that she loved the way her little country voice wrapped around the word Mama, making it sound wholesome and absolutely filthy at the same time.

"I wanna watch you come apart. Don't hold back," Katya whispered and Trixie moaned, thrusting and grinding.  
"Please Mama... Your fingers," Trixie pleaded, gasping.  
"I guess you've been so good," Katya grinned moving her hand down, replacing Trixie's to rub firmly.

The noise Trixie let out was animalistic and Katya could feel Trixie's thighs spasm around her and the small wet gush was ground against the flesh of her own outer thigh.  
Trixie's eyes only opened when Katya pressed her wet fingers against Trixie's plush lips, encouraging her to open up and suck them clean.

"You're so perfect," Katya smiled, kissing her lovingly.  
Trixie hummed in reply, allowing Katya's strong arms to hold and rock her tired body.  
The older woman was exhausted but couldn't bring herself to sleep yet. Not while she had this beautiful woman in her arms. It was far more pleasurable to zone out and stroke the long blonde hair spread across her chest.

Katya was content to hold her close and kiss her until Trixie's appreciative humming faded into sleep and the only audible noise was the rain falling outside.


	11. Blue Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ever had a day ruined by a severe panic attack?  
> Ever felt the overwhelming guilt of someone else having to pick up all your pieces?

From the top of the park, along every wall!  
It poured! And it poured! To wash away all!  
As wet leaves that before the wild hurricane flew,  
When the girls met an obstacle, they had to break through...

 

Katya's peace and tranquillity at waking up with Trixie in her arms lasted all of three seconds until she saw her phone.

\- 8:00 am.   
\- 20 missed called from Shea.   
\- 10 more from Farrah.   
\- Multiple unread text messages.

All she could hear her heart beating violently and the wind whipping around the building outside.

As she opened the messages, her heart stopped entirely.

Massive storm... Whole market blown about... Melted snow and standing water everywhere... Flooding... Massive damage... Get your ass down here now... Pick up your fucking phone...

Her breathing stopped then rapidly increased, huge wheezing breaths wracking her body and nothing but the sounds of the wind and white noise buzzing between her ears. Her eyesight slowly going fuzzy and rubbing her face in her hands, finding both soaking wet with panicked tears.

And then somewhere in the distance...

"Kat, you ok? What's wrong? What's happened? Let me see... Jesus. Ok..."

***********

When Katya woke up, every bone, muscle, nerve ending and cell in her body was fried and exhausted. Her head was being stroked and she could barely tune in to the sounds of Trixie's confident voice giving instructions down the phone.

Her breathing became irregular again but her whole body seemed to give up on the panic attack. Too tired to panic... That was a new one.  
Focusing on calming her breathing and the steady, rhythmical stroking on her hair, Katya began to pick out what Trixie was saying.

"Look, the majority of the stock is right here in Kat's apartment. I can see the boxes piled to the ceiling, girl! There will be some damage but 90% of the stuff is here. There is no point going out in the storm, putting yourselves in danger to try and salvage right now! Surely it would be better to regroup, make some replacement pieces and wait until the storm is passed? I can't speak for Katya but I can speak as someone who cares about y'all who is thinking clearly! I'll get Kat back on her feet. You two focus on boarding up your window. That's your main concern right now... Ok... Bye girls," Trixie sighed and there was quiet again for a moment.

"Sweetie, you just stay with AJ until the storm passes... Aunt T is fine! She's curled up in her flat with the Toucan, a box of wine and Golden Girls... You know I'm fine! I said I'm fine! I'm with Katya. Stay where you are until the storm passes!!... Just don't get pregnant... Shut up, I'm your big sister! I will not be your birth partner... You ain't a cow. I got no expertise with that... FARRAH!! Liking pussy doesn't mean I know how to birth a baby to your idiot ass! Get some rest. I'll call later..."

Turning slightly, Katya saw Trixie throw down her phone. Then, realising that Katya was awake, she snuggled down and kissed her softly.

"You ok, sweetheart?" Trixie's voice was changed, softer than on the phone, sweeter.  
"I'm just tired. Is everyone alright?"  
"Yeah, honey. Everyone is safe indoors. Big weather warnings now so we gotta stay in until it blows over... Although try telling Shea that... Or Farrah..." Trixie murmured against her lips.  
"What about work? It's all my fault. I need to fix this. I've already wasted so much time..." Katya's voice spiked a little with concern again but Trixie shushed her, stroking her hair again.  
"Kat, even if the weather were fine, I still wouldn't be letting you go to work after a panic attack like that. You nearly blacked out. You need rest and comfort and food," Trixie said softly, continuing to soothe her ragged edges.  
"But we need the money so bad? We'll have ruined so much stuff. Aren't you worried?!" Katya's voice wavered.  
"Shhh honey. I can buy flour and sugar and milk any time any place and you will always make more money. What you can't do is bet on your safety going out there today. Everyone will band together when the storm passes and, trust me, you'll not notice the loss as much as you think you will," Trixie soothed.  
"Thanks Trixie. I'm sorry," Katya said slowly, her eyes slipping shut again.  
"Back to bed honey, I'll wake you with something to eat in a bit..."

************

"She's totally right you know," Sasha muttered, stroking Shea's back as she boiled the kettle.  
"I know... I'm not mad at her. I'm mad at the situation," Shea mumbled, the fight gone out of her.  
"I've got some thick card to temporarily fix the window and we can screw that sheet of ply we have in the basement over the top?" Sasha suggested, still stroking the sliver of smooth, dark skin between Shea's pyjama pants and shirt.  
"Yeah... Sounds good. I'm still annoyed. How can everything go to shit in 12 hours?!" Shea growled, pouring two cups of instant coffee.

"Not everything is shit..." Sasha teased, a smirk audible in her voice.  
"What you saying?" Shea snapped her head around, confused and mildly irritated with the jovial tone.

Sasha stood with a stupid smirk, her perfect teeth on full display, with one arched eyebrow indicating the 'obviousness' of what was making her so happy at a time like this. Shea felt stupid, too frazzled to get it.

"Well... Trixie picked up Katya's phone this morning..." Sasha gave a full on grin and Shea couldn't help but match it at the realisation.  
"Yesssssss," Shea grabbed at Sasha, pulling her in tight and doing a stupid dance around the kitchen, the small bald woman laughing hysterically in her arms.

Calming slightly, they broke apart, breathing heavily and moving to sip on the steaming hot coffee.

"You know you're way too invested in your friend's relationship..." Sasha giggled, pulling on Shea's hand and guiding them both back to the bedroom.

 

************

 

"It's really nice to hear from you, especially during the storm... That's so thoughtful! I would really like that... Yeah, I'm tossing the idea around at the moment... Yeah, Aunt T is brilliant. We've always been welcome at hers... That would be lovely. I can't wait to see the salon. I'll see you then..."

 

************

Behind Katya's closed eyelids, her mind raced.

Days disappear when she panics. The anxiety and depression meld together into days of unproductive moping. 

Frantic bursts of stress give way to hours of exhaustion and lethargy. Her brain won't think straight. She can't seem to put her thoughts in order.

And even when she knew she had been doing so well for so long, an emergency situation can cause any strange blend of reactions.

But having a partner she could rely on to pick up the slack on the rare occasion when she can't, could change everything...

But that isn't fair. Relying on someone else to pick up all the pieces just because she can't cope? And she only just met Trixie. She's going through so much for the first time. It wouldn't be right to pile on more and more onto her plate. For fucks sake, by her 30s she should be able to deal with stress by now. She acts like some workaholic but at the first sign of trouble, she's quavering in her boots. It's as if she hasn't improved at all. Why the fuck would Trixie even be interested? Trixie the bold who has everything in front of her. Why would she be interested in a pile of inept human garbage?

The dark thoughts flying around her head felt twisty. Every negative phrase burnt itself into her mind. She could almost imagine her brain blistering as each thought seared the flesh.

But every few minutes or so, she would get a jolt back to reality.  
And the reality with Trixie's soothing voice and calming fingers in her hair? That felt safe. Just for a minute.


	12. Even Santa Claus Gets the Blues

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's bad but not that bad.
> 
> Sorry bout it being a while.

"So up to the market the women they flew,  
With their hearts full of nerves, and uncertainties too."

 

Walking into the wreckage was one of the most nerve-wracking moments of Katya's life but Trixie's strong grip on her hand made it much more bearable.

"Come on, honey, it might not be that bad," Trixie asserted, pulling her through the site, swerving them between puddles and dislodged lumps of green foliage. 

Smashed decorations littered the floor and there was an eerie quiet. It was too early for most other folks to have braved coming through and those who were there were just wandering around in a daze. The site manager had said it was safe to check it out but he didn't advise it. Trixie had scoffed, thrown coats over their pajamas and marched to the van.

The weirdest thing was the smell. It still smelled like pine and wood and cinnamon but it didn't fit with the destruction all around. Katya couldn't reconcile the jolly aroma with the bleak vision around her. She looked down at the ground and let Trixie pull her in the right direction. With every step, she felt more and more sick about what she might see.

The kiosks around the outside were the worst hit with nothing to shelter them. There were bits of roof cast around on the floor and the insides were filled with inches of dirty rainwater. Katya's heart sank for the craftsmen and women who had spent so long creating all the beautiful items which would lie, destroyed, inside.  
However, as they grew closer to the heart of the market, the packed together booths and the tall pines which surrounded them seemed to have offered a bit of protection. The odd shingle lay on the floor but there was far less wreckage. With all the stall owners and a couple of hours it would appear as if nothing had happened. It seemed unfair they had escaped so easily compared to others.

Totally ignoring her own stand, Trixie steered them towards Katya's booth which appeared, from the outside to be in tact.  
Katya took a deep breath and unlocked the door, Trixie's hand resting on her shoulder. The gently placed weight anchored her and gave her the strength to stand firm and swing open the door. 

A flip of the switches proved that the electrics were gone and Katya groaned when the dim light from outside revealed that there was standing water on the ground. The water swirled brown, filled with leaves and mud.

Katya's stomach lurched at the sight of it.

"It's not the end of the world. The site manager told me that they're getting a new generator delivered tonight and the power should be back in a couple of days. It's ok," Trixie reassured.  
"I'm more worried about the stock," Katya wheezed hoarsely, her mouth dry.  
"Come on, let's look," Trixie cajoled, squeezing past Katya into the booth, her boots splashing on the floor.

A quick inventory revealed that all of the fabric and paper products had been packed properly into the plastic crates and the only water damage had been on the very top layer where the lid had a little crack.  
Katya calculated that loss quickly enough. Maybe $50. Considering they kept the bare minimum inside the booth, that wasn't too bad.  
However, the clay items, packed in cardboard boxes, looked in worse condition.  
Trixie began peeling the rotting cardboard mush off the pottery and placing it on the counter for inspection.  
90% of it was ok. Filthy. But ok.  
Katya calculator clacked up to $100. Still not the end of the world.

"Hey, Kat. Can these be washed?" Trixie asked, cautiously, lifting a medium sized bowl.  
"Yeah. Thank God. Yeah," Katya sighed.

Trixie gave a small smile and they kept picking at what was left of the boxes.

The biggest loss was their old faithful till. It was soaked right through and Katya was sure that no amount of action with the hairdryer would be able to dry it out. 

$200.

A morning's earnings. Plus the three days earnings they were going to lose. It was a pretty big hit. Big enough that their insurance would pay out.

Katya breathed out and finally felt her pulse slow.  
She wrapped her arms around Trixie and kissed her softly.

"Sweet spot. Enough damage that the insurance will pay out. Not so much damage that we can't set up shop again," Katya said, muffled by Trixie's huge scarf and her even huger hair.  
"Thank the Lord. Let's bin the wreckage, rescue the rest and get the fuck out of this wasteland," Trixie replied, her tone even and strong. 

They shuffled around for the next hour taking photographs of everything before loading up the van with every scrap of stock they could salvage.  
Katya took a moment to send the good news to the collective and instructions to Kasha about the details for the insurance claim while Trixie ventured over the the Crepe stand.

"How was it Barbie?" Katya said, grimacing.  
"It's kind of a wreck in there but the equipment looks fine. Just the ingredients to be scrapped. And it's hard to tell with the power out. Aunt T is coming over later with the insurance guy so I'm just gonna leave it," Trixie replied with a shrug.  
"I'm sorry, sweetheart. You wanna head home?" Katya asked, wrapping an arm around Trixie's waist.  
"I'd love that," Trixie replied, her voice softer, more tired, than Katya had heard it over the last twenty four hours.

*****************

In the early hours of the next morning, when there was a misty, grey light drifting through the gaps in the curtains, Katya wrote a love letter in her head to soft bossy women. In particular, the love letter was directed towards the bossiest, softest woman who was curled up in her bed.   
Katya loved the way she ordered everyone around. She had everyone running a little bit scared of her strong will and bravery. After seeing the gorgeous blonde run the stand for weeks, Katya had grown to love watching the way she took charge and made the world work for her.  
But her dumb heart also fluttered at the way Trixie held her tight when they were alone, the way she called her 'her sweetheart' and the tender, shy way she approached their physical relationship.

Katya wondered how many people got to see Trixie like this. Tender and sweet in the deepest sleep. Her pouty lips relaxed and her cheeks squished against the pillow. It was maybe the blonde hair but she looked like an angel.

The entirety of the day before she had tended to Katya. Petting her, feeding her, letting her sleep.  
Today she had been the power behind their clean up crew. She had refused to wallow. She created action.   
Katya had been panicky and lost at the thought of letting someone help her.   
However, somehow, in the morning light she was able to accept it. For the first time, Katya didn't feel any guilt. She just felt gratitude.

"Please don't go..."

The tiny whisper escaped Katya's lips before she realised what she had said.

'How could she be so passionately invested in someone she had known for so little time?'

The thought circled her brain until she looked down again and saw Trixie's elegant fingers gripping the comforter's edge, the little starlights on her rings glimmering in the semi darkness.  
Trixie was perfect. The real question was 'how could anyone not be passionately invested in Trixie Mattel?'.

The truth was that Katya was brilliant at so many things professionally but, personally, she had never fully managed to get it together.   
If Trixie left, she would have to go through what it feels like to truly have everything she wants and then lose it.

Katya slowly and surely opened her arms as she opened her heart and pulled Trixie close. She whispered her deepest desires against her dreaming head and pressed kisses into the blonde curls.  
Trixie snuffled a bit, clinging on to the edge of sleep and Katya held her breath until she heard a small sigh and a tiny snore.

It was easy to fall back to sleep after that.


End file.
